Ask NML: Resolving Back-and-Forth Conflicts Between Preschoolers
/“…the best thing to keep in mind is that this is the learning - the main, vital, critical thing the children need to learn how to do - be in the world with others…”
Read More“…the best thing to keep in mind is that this is the learning - the main, vital, critical thing the children need to learn how to do - be in the world with others…”
Read More“…Imagine: you know something big is coming. Something life-changing. You’ve heard everyone you know mention this unfamiliar thing that will make you into a different sort of person (read: big kid). Even if you know someone else who has done this thing, you still don’t know exactly what the future holds for you. You can’t know until you get there…”
Read More“…To very young children, however, these words are useful. Children employ “Best Friend” and it’s inverse, “Not My Friend,” because it communicates something very clearly and with great effect - closeness or space, sometimes tears, sometimes adult attention…”
Read More“…The key to successful goodbyes is a clear, pre-determined, and consistent routine for saying goodbye each day…”
Read More“…Yet there, in my home, at 11pm on New Year’s Eve, was the echo of some adultified thunder I thought I had pushed aside.
I didn’t have a childproof room. I had a childproof heart, which was much worse…”
“…Bathroom accidents are physiological responses to the complex logistical, cognitive, and emotional complexity of learning about and living in the world. Young children are tasked with developing so many parts of themselves simultaneously - it is reasonable for the child (and the caregiver) to get stuck or overwhelmed occasionally...”
Read More“…Conflicts commonly arise between children when it comes to the negotiation of resources. For our purposes, “resources” means anything the child sees as valuable, including toys, food, interesting objects, or even attention from others…”
Read More“…Young children, especially, are scientists tenured at the intersection of nature and nurture. The drive to constantly learn more is natural -- children have a physiological need to experience novelty and integrate new information into their thinking. Supporting that growth is about providing meaningful experiences and useful, developmentally appropriate feedback. The way we as adults respond nurtures either the development, refinement, or inhibition of children’s understandings…”
Read MorePractice, Not Magic is a series of posts about the practical aspects of living alongside young children.
…To a child under the age of about 6, stopping mid-game really can feel like it’s the end of that play experience forever. Our goal as the adult, beyond just getting the space cleaned up and facilitating a transition, is to support the child to move from a mental place of scarcity (“I must do this now because I will never have what I want again”) to one of trust (“I know my ideas and my things are safe in my family/classroom and will be available again”)…
Read MorePractice, Not Magic is a series of posts about the practical aspects of living alongside young children. Focusing on one vignette, we can parse out the developmental from the situational and how to think through common dilemmas faced by parents, teachers, cool aunts, and chosen family, et al.
Children’s resistance to cleaning up can be about a few things. Here will will consider one possible problem and reflective solution….
Read MoreMicah Card is a writer and educator in Los Angeles, CA.
No Magic Lecture is a blog about teaching, learning, and living alongside young children, though the principles here apply to all learners (including you!). Creating a meaningful life with children is about holding a vision and seeing it through together. The phrase “No Magic Lecture” means there is no one perfect thing that must make or break a moment, a behavior, a child, family, or classroom. It’s a reminder, reprieve, and an invitation. Welcome.
Micah Card is a writer and educator in Santa Cruz, CA. She believes in the power of children, thinking deeply and critically, and in reminding ourselves that the point of all this is to grow.
To learn more about Micah’s work and credentials, click here.